Saying Goodbye...

Wow, my quit date for smoking is just a couple of days away. I woke up this morning feeling pretty good and then I checked my email...

I have been taking my Chantix (stop smoking pills) faithfully each day and I signed up on their website, "The Get Quit Support Plan". It sends me a daily email with an activity to do as a way to help me prepare for my quit date.

Today's activity, well I have to admit, is going to be hard. It instantly put a lump in my throat and made me sad, I have even cried this morning about having to do it. My task today is to write a "Good-bye" letter to my cigarettes. I want to say good-bye, it is a very emotional thing for me right now. We have been friends for a long long time, or so I thought. As we all know, breaking up is hard to do. I hate good-byes!!!

I would normally write a letter like this and keep it private, but I have decided to write it for the whole world to see. Yes, that is right, I'm putting myself out there for you all and maybe it will help me a little bit more.

April, 29, 2008

Dear Winston Light 100's,

We have been together for many years, 30 to be exact. I remember the day we met, I didn't like you at first, but then you certainly grew on me. I couldn't resist you at all. I wasn't attracted to you in the beginning, I started seeing you because someone told me I couldn't. I decided to prove them wrong and then they said goodbye to me. I thought that was OK at the time, because I had a relationship with you and I wasn't alone.

We've really had some great times. Hanging out with my friends, lets not forget your friend Miller Lite, he seemed to hang around us too. This is good bye to him as well, I have to make a clean break with you and your friend for this all to work for me.

I remember us being together after meals, going on car rides and we even liked being on the phone at the same time. And you were always there for me when things got rough, in fact, I've always thought of you as a good friend. But the truth is, you're no friend at all. You're doing your best to make me sick. I have a morning cough that never goes away and I run out of breath when I need it the most. I'm truly tired of you.

You have taken away alot of time I could have shared with my family. To be honest with you, they don't like you and I'm tired of living my life around you. I won't be standing outside in the weather anymore just to be with you. I'm going to be inside with my family enjoying life.

And the money, the thousands of dollars I've spent on you. If I had saved all that money, I could probably have the deed to our dream house in my hand right now, instead of you. I'd be sitting on a balcony with the ocean breeze blowing in my face and watching the sun set.

It will be nice not to have to take you everywhere I go, I won't have you sitting there wanting me to pick you up and be at your beck and call. I need my space, just ask my husband, he will tell you. Oh well, enough is enough. Sure, we've had some good times, but it's not worth the cost anymore. You aren't going to control me ever again.

I'm feeling a bit of panic right now and it IS your fault, but let me assure you, I'm going to get over you pretty quick. I have my family supporting me and I don't need you anymore. So I'm saying good-bye, knowing you will never hurt me again!!!

GOOD-BYE WINSTON

My Quit Date Is...

May 1, 2008

I hope you all will continue to support me and love me... before, during and after all sudden mood swings.

Please consider yourselves warned!!!

Love, Mom

Viewer Discretion Is Advised...

I'm sure you all knew this story was coming.

My surgery to have a plantars wart removed was Friday, let me tell you it was a painful thing to have and I don't wish it on anyone. I'm glad it's gone now. Both of the doctors that looked at me chose to you the words "that's a pretty one you got there" So, I took that as it was quite a good sized wart.

My surgery went great, I slept through the whole thing, (awww I'm in love with demerol IV sedation, that's the way to go). I was told the drugs would give me amnesia, well it did and I don't remember a thing, woohoo!!! When I got home and looked down at my foot, my first reaction was, "I have a gorilla toe now" then I kinda thought it looked like I had a potato stuck on my foot. Boy, I can't believe the power of medicine... gorilla's and potatoes what a combination. I'm sure you can see why I thought that... by looking at the picture below.

My wonderful husband brought me home and tucked me into bed with my foot propped up on a couple of pillows, he then made sure I had my coke, cigarettes, pain pills and the tv was put on the right channel before he went on to work. I did really well and dozed off and on most of the day. Yesterday my sister came over and stayed with me all afternoon and helped me do my first foot soaking in an antiseptic solution. Not only was she a great nurse, she made me lunch, took down our Christmas tree and vacuumed my living room for me.

Below is the outcome of surgery.... I now have a hole in my toe about 1/8" deep. The numbing medicine they injected finally wore off late yesterday and it is a bit painful today. The doctor told my husband that I wouldn't have a permanent hole in my toe and that as it heals the skin will grow back. That is really good news, because it looks like a crater right now to me. The picture doesn't show the depth very much.

So, just to let everyone know, I go back to the doctor on the 3rd for a follow-up exam and as of right now I'm taking my pills, I'm doing great and I can't wait to put my shoes back on!

I apologize if this doesn't read as well as it should, just blame it on the pain pills!